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Funny

A COCKROACH Is Afraid Of RAT, RAT Of CAT, CAT Of DOG, DOG Of MAN, MAN Of GIRLFRIEND, & Again GIRLFRIEND Is Afraid Of COCKROACH.
Husband, Throwing Knives On Wife's Photo & Missing The Target. Sudenly He Recvd A Call Frm His Wife: Hi, What R U Doing? He Repld "MISSIN U"
My Mom Thinks "LOL" Means "Lots Of Love". She Texted Me, "Your Grandma Had Just Died. LOL"
When A Girl Cancels A Date Its Because She Has To. When A Guy Cancels A Date Its Because He Has TWO!
America Is A Country Where Half The Money Is Spent In Buying Food And The Other Half Is Spent To Loose Weight! 
Forget Your Ex. Because No One Wants To Read Yesterdays Newspaper Again.
My Girlfriend And I Were Happy For EIGHTEEN Years. Then We Met.
I Told My Wife That, "I Need More Space." So She Locked Me Outside
Why Is That When There Are Two Girls In A Profile Pic The Hot One Is Always Someone Else?
I Recently Applied For Work At A Mirror Shop. I Hope I Get It. I Can Really See Myself Working There.
Wife Pulls Her Husband,Who’s Fully Drunk, To Bed & Tries Removing His Shirt & Husband Replies- LADY, LEAVE ME ALONE, I AM Married
Amy Winehouse, Kurt Cobain, Jimmi Hendrix, Ian Curtis, Jim Morrison, All Died At 27. Justin Bieber Turns 27 In 2021. Just Be Patient.
Breaking News: Idea To Launch 3G Condoms To Control Population Growth
When I Fight For Love People Call It Rape...
Roses Are Red. Violets Are Blue. Faces Like Yours Belong In The Zoo. Don’t Be Mad, I’ll Be There Too. Not In The Cage But Laughing At You
Sometimes, My Secretary Reminds Me Of My Wife.I Was Unbuttoning Her Shirt During Our Lunch Break When She Says, "Remember, You Have A Wife."
 Every Mother Thinks That Their Child Is The Most Beautiful, But Only My Mum Is Right!
I'm Jealous Of My Parents... I'll Never Have A Kid As Cool As Theirs! `
Deleting Your Facebook Is The New Regaining Your Dignity.
I Don't Understand How Super Mario Can Smash Blocks With His Head But Dies When He Touches A Turtle. Wtf
Is Your Life Boring? Yes? Then Type 'I Love <Ur Bf/Gf Name>' And Send It To All Your Relatives! Your Life Won't Be Boring Anymore! :P 
Your Password Is Incorrect”; I Changed All My Password To ‘Incorrect’, So My Computer Just Tells Me When I Forget.....JK
Win A BLACKBERRY, A CAR, Or A HOUSE In DUBAI...Use A Sharp Object To Scratch Here▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒​  Please Do This Now.
 When Aryabhatta Was Checking My Answer Paper.......................................He Invented 'ZERO' ;-)
Studying Is As Easy As Walking In A Park And That Park Is Like Jurassic Park!
Great People Talk About Ideas. Average People Talk About Things. Small People Talk About Others. Legends Don't Talk, They Blog! ;) :P
So How Many Of You Are Planning To Ditch Facebook For Google Plus :P
A Woodcutter Was Passing By A Forest And Suddenly He Saw A Bunch Of Girls Following Him. The Axe Effect! ;)
Employee To Manager : If You Don't Increase My Salary Then I'll Tell The Whole Office That You Have Increased My Salary! :P
Definition Of A Human Being: A Creature That Cuts Trees,Makes Paper & Writes "Save Trees" On The Same Paper.
1 Month Before The Exam We Study From National Author's Book. 1 Day Before,Local Author Book. Exam Day,Do Hell With Others , I AM THE AUTHOR
"No Comment" Is A Comment. Lols
Money & Women.They're Two Of The Strongest Things In The World.The Things U Do For A Woman U Wouldn't Do For Anything Else.Same With Money.
I Wish My Parents Were Like Google. They Should Understand Me Even Before I Complete.
Before You Criticize Someone,Walk A Mile In His Shoes.That Way,You're A Mile Away And You Have The Shoes.
Exam Paper Is Like A Dick, When Its Hard, People Get Fucked.!
My Girl And I Always Joke Around. She'll Ask "What Were You Doing?", Then We'll Both Laugh And Then I Go Make Sure I Cleared My Web History
Dog: Why Do U Hide When Having Sex? Cat: Cause We Don't Want Humans To Copy Our Style, They've Already Copied Yours.
Daughter: M In Love With Neighbor, So M Running Away With Him. Dad- Thank Dear, U Saved Money & Time Both. Dad M Reading Dis Letter Left By Mom
Guy: Do U Lyk Me? Gal:No(Guy Got Sad) Gal: Y R U Sad? Guy: Coz U Dnt Lyk Me. Gal:U Nvr Askd If I Luv U. Guy:Aww!Do U Luv Me? Gal: LOL NO!!
Dear Facebook, Don't Show That Much Attitude! You Can't Even Signup Without Me !!! ... Yours Sincerely, Msn, G Mail N Yahoo.. =D
WTF Generation... Wikipedia Twitter Facebook
The Only Difference Between Government And Thieves Is, One Of Them Does It Legally;)))
INSULT & WIFE Are Somewhat Similar....They Always Look Good...IF IT IS NOT YOURS... :P
'I Have Read And Agree To Terms And Conditions' Should Be Called As "I Didn't Read But I Want To Access This Shit.
I'm So Good At Sleeping, I Can Do It With My Eyes Closed.
Being Told That Someone Doesn't Wanna Love U Coz Ur A Good Friend Is Like Being Told That U Didn't Get D Job Coz Ur Highly Qualified.
Note To Self: Never Take A Pen To A Sword Fight Again. Its Most Definitely Not Mightier.
A Baby Is Born In Africa, What Will Be The Color Of His Teeth? ....Babies Are Born Without TEETH. MORAL ~ Don't Think Like A Genius !!
Knowledge Is Everywhere. You Just Need To Know How To Google It. 
I Like To Stand In Line At The ATM Machine. When People Put In Their PIN, I Scream "GOT IT!" And Run Away
A Funny T Shirt Quote Written At Back Of A Bike Rider's Shirt:If U're Able To See This Sentence Plz Infrm Me Dat My Grlfrnd Hs Fallen Off!
Children In The Dark Cause Accidents, Accidents In The Dark Cause Children

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